Wednesday, 12 March 2008

Kiwi girls

Three men were sitting together bragging about how they had given their new wives duties.

Terry had married a woman from America, and bragged that he had told his wife she was going to do all the dishes and housework. He said that it took a couple days but on the third day he came home to a clean house and the dishes were all washed and put away.

Jimmie had married a woman from Canada. He bragged that he had given his wife orders that she was to do all the cleaning, dishes, and the cooking. He told them that the first day he didn't see any results,but the next day it was better. By the third day, his house was clean,the dishes were done, and he had a huge dinner on the table.

The third man Dave, had married a New Zealand girl. He boasted that he told her that her duties were to keep the house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed and hot meals on the table for every meal. He said the first day he didn't see anything, the second day he didn't see anything, but by the third day most of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out of his left eye. Enough to fix himself a bite to eat, load the dishwasher, and call a landscaper.

Thought: Could this be the real reason that more kiwi boys are marry lasses from overseas?

The Ex-Expat has a great blog on the ugly attacks coming from all angles at the lovely single kiwi lady.

I'm not sure why we have become public enemy #1 - all the single girls I know are extremely well presented, kind, fun and intelligent - yes they have opinions, but who doesn't?


Mrs Smith said...

I saw something on 'Oprah' years ago about being an obedient wife - never disagree with husband, he makes all the decisions, etc. I tried it out for a laugh, and it drove Mr Smith quite mad. After about an hour he told me to stop it. So there! Not all men want a polite servant for a wife.

Annie Fox! said...

Oh good, that's a relief.

Mr Smith doesn't have a brother does he? Not that brothers are alike, if mine are anything to go by.

Oswald Bastable said...

Q- What does a Kiwi woman do with her arsehole first thing in the morning?

A- Gives him a cut lunch and sends him off to work!

Annie Fox! said...

What's a "cut lunch"? Is that when he cuts lunch so he can get rid of that beer-belly?

Oswald Bastable said...

Another 'generation gap' thing!


Andrew said...

I was taking a girl out who soon turned out be something like the trial Mrs Smith.
In the course of a conversation I asked her what she thought about a pretty normal topic and her response was "I don't know. What do you think?"
Uggh. I was happily single shortly thereafter.

Annie Fox! said...

God poor you ... well yes women in general really do piss me off 99% of the time. I really do feel sorry for you straight guys that in order to have a relationship that fits with you biologically, you have to mentally associate with women. I'm lucky I'm a women, I'm straight and I get to hang out with men - couldn't be better. If I was a man I'd be gay.

But fair's fair, I don't think it is a Kiwi thing - women all over the world are difficult - I actually think Kiwi women are less so.

Male friend is here, serving me lovely Moet, and say's "men die younger than women, to get away from the nagging" - could be true?

Anonymous said...

Yea it just so happens those opinions are nearly always ugly and obnoxious, which tends to make your personality rather repulsive aswell.

Anonymous said...

Tribalistic bollocks, the lot of it. Including the Ex-Expat blog.

Who effing cares if NZ blokes are marrying overseas women. Mind your own sodding business.

But if you must know the answer its simple statistics. Stick to NZ and you've got maybe 250,000 single adult women to choose from. Spread your net wider and the number goes up a couple of orders of magnitude.

Unlike the old days, air-travel means that you don't have to settle for second best. If you can't find what you want in NZ, go overseas and look there.

Notice how many of the respondents to the blog stated that they were happily involved with their foreign lover. It wasn't because they were foreign, it's because the individual they'd found was perfect for them.

Hence my derision at this collectivist bullshit.

Heine said...

I married an overseas girl and I think I am bloody lucky.

I don't mind Kiwi girls at all, but everybody is different and have their own quirks. In my case my wife and her fellow countrywomen all really take a lot better care of themselves, would never be seen farting or burping or walking about in trackies and jandals.

The downside is now I can't either!

Love the blog. Added to my blog roll.

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Walter Greenleaf said...